With May being mental health awareness month, I think now is a good time to share some of my story 💕
in hopes that it will inspire or save a life.
I was just getting out of an almost 4 year abusive relationship, from which I gained my first child. So, I was coming out of that as a teen mom. The first time I started experiencing the heart-racing, scared sweats, out of a deep sleep, was shortly after that. I had also been struck by my own vehicle around that time, and my second child was about two months old. I couldn’t figure out why this was happening but it became frequent. Up to three to five times a night.
With two very young children, I felt alone, scared and confused. Even when others were around me. It wasn’t long after these things started that I was diagnosed with anxiety and panic attacks. All the doctors could SEE was a perfectly healthy 22 year old. The key word here is SEE. On the outside I looked fine. I was healthy. But, my mind wasn’t okay. Mental illness is often invisible and what you SEE isn’t always a good judge of someone’s life.
Very few trusted people knew how hard I was struggling. I was called “damaged goods” by one person. Others just made me feel crazy for “freaking out”. Anyone with anxiety or any other mental illness ever been labeled? Called “damaged goods”? Felt crazy? You aren’t alone then! I promise!
All these things started about 8 years ago. I am now 29. I have 5 kids, an incredible husband and a beautiful life. This isn’t the end of my story though, nor is it every detail. It is the highlight reel of anxiety in my early years of the disease. Every day is still a struggle. Some days are just easier than others. However, I’m choosing daily to thrive through it and to use it to encourage others and give hope in a hard spot!
So, stay tuned for part 2! Where I’ll give you my tips on thriving through anxiety and mental illness. I’ll show you how to find LIGHT, JOY and HOPE in the darkness of our minds.
I’ll tell you why, after 8 years of incredibly hard stuff, that I didn’t just end it all. My littles are only the half of it.🙌🏻💕