Have you ever thought about the impact we have on our husbands? WE get to choose how we use that influence. In this world, we are shown that women have this HUGE effect on men, but in the way of a temptress usually. The world makes it look like we have some kind of spell over them. What if we used that characteristic in the way God intended for it to be used? ( Genesis 2:18) What if we used our voices and our hearts to speak life into our men? Can you imagine the impact that could have on our homes? I believe there is a great reason God gave us the ability to influence our husbands. Derek and I have been married for 4 years and together for 5, so i wouldn’t say that I’m a veteran by any means haha. However, God has definitely shown me a thing..or 100 about how i can better serve and honor my husband. As much as I know my husband, God knows him better. Which is why one of the huge things God has shown me that my husband needs is for me to speak life into and over him. My dear, incredible husband, like many others, struggles with depression from time to time. While your hubby may or may not struggle with that…we all have our days for something to go wrong and we need to be there to encourage them, uplift them and remind them that they are loved, worthy and important. Speaking life may look different for you than it would me but whatever we choose to do, the key is in actually DOING. Love is an action. A choice. So, lets talk about some ways that I’ve learned over the years to speak life into my husband and new things I”m trying. Maybe you’ll find something new to try or maybe you’re already doing some of these and they are working for your husband, family and marriage too! 🙂
The biggest thing I’ve been doing lately that seems to help my husband is speaking the truth of scripture to him. When he texts me or calls with a struggle or problem, I quickly scan my brain and heart for what the Holy Spirit has taught me to be true from the word. Sometimes it sinks in quickly and sometimes he has to sit on it all day and pray more into it himself. Either way, it’s a great way to encourage him during a hard time and give his mind something true to think on!
I know this will sound so simple but i think its under rated…saying thank you when he intentionally makes sure the house is clean when i get home after looonng days on Mondays and Wednesdays. It makes me see how important I am to him… and my appreciation shows him that same thing! Everyone wins here!
Years ago, I would leave notes on his bananas that said things like, ” I’m bananas for you.” I need to start doing this again.
I do something with him that I don’t necessarily like (such as watching NFL football haha) because it means I get time with him and shows him that him and his desires are important to me. Again, we all win here!
THIS IS MY FAVORITE!!!: I call out the characteristics that God is growing in him. It may not always be visible because we all fall short but him knowing that God has brought him SO very far from being angry to being more gentle…big deal! He needs me to remind him of that on the hard days when he sees nothing but failure. <3
I pray for him. When he asks, when he doesn’t ssk. Always pray for him.
Send him texts through the day to let him know I am thinking of him. The messages are always different because God is always changing and challenging my heart. 🙂
When you speak about him to others…. it should ALWAYS be positive and encouraging. WE edify and esteem our husbands. If he has done something to irritate me (you) or whatever…don’t speak that to others. Take it to him and God. Always speak well of your husband to others. Whether he is around or not.
Is he courageous? bold? full of heart? honest? faithful? have integrity? a good dad? a good maintenance man? a hard worker? Tell him these things! 🙂
Before our time together today ends, I want to remind myself and you of how this is all biblical.
In Philippians 1:6 we are reminded that He who began a good work in you will be faithful to complete it until the day of Jesus Christ. That is true for us all!
“Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.” Colossians 3:12-14
Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.” 1 Thessalonians 5:11
Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person.” (Colossians 4:6). This is especially true for the building up of our marriages.
Ladies, we know our husbands better than anyone else knows them. Nobody else is best suited to speak life into them like we are, so let’s choose and use our words wisely. Let’s not waste or misuse our words.